Because stuff needs talking about.

Like White on Rice

Out of the hundreds that try, only a few adverts that go for the wacky approach ever work and they’re pretty much always for kids’ cereals. One that tried and got it all wrong, is Uncle Ben’s Express Rice.

First things first Ben, you make rice, plain old, bog standard rice, it will always be rice and no amount of wishing is going to change that. Rice goes with stuff, it’s an accompaniment, like a bass guitar, or a boring friend, nice to have around but you’re not going to want them on their own. This advertising strategy goes against the engrained (lol) role of rice in society. Uncle Ben’s tries to push it to the foreground and therefore must create a world of such wackiness as to support such an idea.

So we step into Ben’s world, a place where electrical appliances only respond to vocal peace talk and men wear shirts made from 70s wallpaper. This disaster-clad fool doesn’t understand, despite being informed by his lady friend, that he has to talk to the microwave. I mean, honestly, what kind of moron is this guy? You would have thought he have some experience of magic seeing as he clearly takes his fashion advice from Ron Weasley. Bloody Muggles. Of course he has to talk to the microwave. How else would he do his job and tell the audience that the rice isn’t full of additives and all that. Hardly shocking news really though Ben seeing as, well, you’re just rice.

The sceptical fashion black hole does as he’s told and is rewarded with the rice for him and his friends to enjoy (hopefully as an accompaniment), while said friends look at him like he’s an idiot. He tries to repair his faux pas with a quip “I’ll just go and speak to the dish washer” to which his lady friend replies, “Don’t be a fucking idiot, mudblood.” Well not exactly but she might have well of with that patronising laugh and eye-roll she offers instead.

So to summarise, you’ve just spent thirty seconds watching a man talk to a microwave to try and sell a product which is half the world’s staple food. Pointless isn’t the word.

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One response

  1. Excellent. I’ve never been a fan of the “wacky” approach to advertising, it always makes me imagine how it came up in the meeting…”I know, we could have a guy talking to a microwave asking it to give him the rice!”. His colleagues snigger and roll their eyes, but the boss strokes his goatee…”I like it!”. As Shakespeare once said, what the fucking fuck?!

    “like a bass guitar, or a boring friend, nice to have around but you’re not going to want them on their own.”

    LMAO.

    “to which his lady friend replies, “Don’t be a fucking idiot, mudblood.””

    LMFAO!

    “You would of thought…”

    I might write to your mother.

    March 8, 2012 at 9:27 pm

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