Because stuff needs talking about.

Cage Rage: A Question of Names

Try every name in the list with this picture, it works a treat!

I’ve been a little busy lately, mainly with work related things so I thought I’d make this post a bit of a short one.  However, it has been one of my favourites to write and will hopefully be fun to read as well.  It’s about Nic Cage for God’s sake how could it not be totally awesome!?

I’ve had a theory for a while that the worse the Nic Cage film, the more overblown and incredulous his character’s name has to be.  This list can be seen as a reserve store; we all hope that a Cage film can’t be so bad as to warrant one of these statements of obviousness, unless there is a Snake Eyes sequel on the way that I don’t know about.

Anyway, this list is here should you ever to need to spell out exactly your character’s patriotism and love for your family, or if you are under the impression that the audience won’t be able to determine your role as a misunderstood good guy through all the gun firing and explosions.  Enough talk, here it is, sit back and think of America:

Tennessee Lincoln

Jack Everyman

Cassius Truthseeker

Montana Headstrong

Vice McBane

Will N. Tact

Samson Carter

Laura Biding (disguised as a woman)

Ray O’Light

Free Spirit

Maverick Chamberlain

Monument Hill

Roosevelt Fury

Lincoln Peacemaker

Blake Veteran

Arizona Faithful

John Renegade

Jackson Thunder

Utah Grace

And, my personal favourite:

Pat Riot

I would like to thank Mr. Cage for the endless amusement and inspiration to write.  Without this man’s extraordinary talent, I would have many blank pages, and ITV 2 would be screwed.  Just take a look at this:


2 responses

  1. wordpressreport

    Reblogged this on WordPress Report.

    May 23, 2012 at 10:35 pm

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